About Me

Okay, so about me. Suzie, the Bridal Consultant who hates weddings. Right off I feel I need to clarify a few things about why I chose that name for this blog. I am a Bridal Consultant. "What is that?", you ask... That means I work at a local bridal shop and assist women in picking out the most perfect white (or ivory) wedding dress of their dreams, for their most perfect day to start their most perfect life with the most perfect man (or woman) they've ever met. Basically I ask them what they want and zip the dress up. Please don't be deterred by my sarcastic tones, I love my job. I actually love wedding dresses. I really love brides and helping them find that most perfect dream dress. I love flowers, I love cake, I love giving gifts like electric knives to the starry eyed bride and groom. And despite my sarcasm and bitterness that will rear its head from time to time in my blogs I really do love romance. And yes, I do watch Say Yes to the Dress, and no people really don't act like that. And I am a huge advocate for marriage and family.  I just hate weddings. First of all, they are ridiculously expensive, especially if you are "going all out". "Going all out" means you do everything. A beautiful and large venue, like a hotel or old church in the country converted into a reception hall. You will have a D.J., a photographer, caterer, cake decorator, florist, tuxedos for every single man you know, brides maids dresses, mother of the bride dress, mother of the groom dress, flower girl dresses, officiator, marriage license, wedding planner and decorator. All this will set you back about $20,000 and thats cheap. Not to mention the wedding dress, which is at the average price of $1,300, currently.
And despite all your planning, and spending and that binder filled with pictures and magazine clippings and the movie playing in your mind  of how everything should and will be, it wont. Hate to burst your bubble sweetheart, but your wedding will not be perfect. You will find something wrong or out of place and someone to blame for it. You will get angry because it did not go your way, you may cry, you may find yourself screaming on the best man's cell phone at a perfect stranger yelling "I asked for mint green tablecloths, and you sent me sage... SAGE!" And while your mascara is running and your maid of honor is trying to console you, you find the D.J is late,  you paid him an extra $40 to show up an hour early so he could get set up before the guests arrive in a half hour. You're stressed there aren't enough flowers, this venue is bigger that you remembered, there should be more flowers here, people wont be impressed if there arent enough flowers, can you get more flowers? How much do you have to pay to get more flowers... 
STRESS!!!!
And for what? It is only ONE day. This is why I hate weddings. You (and by you I mean the bride) stresses and stresses for months about all these tiny details, and the day comes and its not all you dreamed and your upset. And it's over and you can't do anything about it... maybe you can get some money back, if someone really did drop the ball, like a wedding singer showing up drunk. It can't be perfect, life isn't perfect, people aren't perfect, YOU aren't perfect, and your marriage most certainly wont be perfect.
Why do women stress so much over their wedding day? Well, not ALL women do. I have met hudereds of brides over the last 4 years as a consultant and everyone is different. MOST do stress about those tiny details, but not all. Let me tell you a little something about me, I never like to generalize, I think its' a stupid person's escape. Everyone is different and everyone handles stress differently. I have met brides who had everything fall apart on their wedding day and smiled and laughed through it all because they were happy they were getting married to the person they wanted to spend the rest of their lives with. But why DO most women stress so much over these things?
I think its because for some women, it represents a pivotal peak in their lives. Like winning an olympic gold medal, or a pulitzer. It starts when we're young, we are conditioned to believe, even in today's world, that men have careers and women have a husband and kids. Everything before that is just a prep course. 
Learn to dance, sing, be beautiful and skinny, smart (but not too smart) always be agreeable and kind, walk in high heels, smell good, flirt (but not too much) and you'll land that perfect man and he will be handsome and rich and he will ask you to marry him. Your wedding day is like Graduation day, you finally made it, you're here, you're a woman now, you've reached your goal. It feels like, to this type of woman, that your climbing a mountain and the wedding is top, then, its all down hill from there. No more dating, men will stop chasing you, no reason to look good for anyone anymore, no more prep courses. And its all over.  So this is your last day to shine. Your last day to step out and say "hey world I am here and I am awesome! Come admire me!" So yeah, it must be perfect. Men don't have this problem because they play football and score touch downs, they start a career and get promoted, become head of the math club or whatever. 
Men are expected to and have the opportunity to have their shining moment more times than women do. Once again, this is just for most not all men and women. I know there are many women athletes and CEO's who's wedding was not the crowning glory of their lives. But, for the women who've never gotten the lead role, won the race or became head of the board, this is her one moment to shine. So it better be perfect. I hate going to weddings them because that's the feeling I get when I go. If I don't compliment her on how great everything is, she'll hate me and herself for not making it great. Plus, I hate small talk. I want to get right down to what's real. Like "How soon are you going to have kids? Who's going to be the financial planner in this marriage? Do you like his parents? Do you like HER parents? Would divorce each other if one of you was unfaithful or stay together for the kids...?" But I'm socially awkward that way. 
I've been invited to many weddings, as a Bridal Consultant I get asked all the time. I always come up with an excuse "I have to work that day..." That's actually true, most weddings are on Saturdays and  in the wedding business you will work every saturday. I've been to 10 weddings in my life, and was a brides maid in 2. Being apart of a "line" is not fun, you stand there and greet a bunch of people you don't know in a dress you don't like for a friend or relative you love. Slipping in and out for some cake and dropping off a present is far better. After all that stress and fuss and spending, your wedding should be what others expect, "nice". And it will be just that. No one will notice, or care, or remember anything about your wedding other than the cake was too try and the fish to salty. But mostly they will think your wedding was just "nice", and that's ok. 
So, if anyone is reading this, please expect less talk about my distaste for weddings, and a bit more about wedding dresses. I plan to write about up coming trends in the wedding biz and maybe a funny story or two. Enjoy!